The Onion is always worth reading, but this one is extra worth reading.

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/victim_of_mall_shooting_determined

I know just how he feels.

http://birdloversonly.blogspot.com/2007/09/may-i-have-this-dance.html

I'm sure this is all over the net, I'm just putting it here so I can find it later.

burger_eater flagged me with this.

It's a "herding cat" game called Chat Noir.

Spreading around LJ like a virus, I'm putting it here for me and the three of you who haven't seen it yet...

Everything a Mom says each and every day, set to the William Tell Overture.

According to the UK's Daily Mail, the Ig Noble awards, celebrating the odd and quirky side of science, were handed out the other night at Harvard. The biology one, about the variety and number of organisms living on a sheet, would make interesting reading. The Peace award went to the United States Air Force, for alleged efforts to make a chemical weapon that would cause enemy soldiers to be overcome by lust, the so-called "gay bomb".

Come to think of it, it would make a great novel, coauthored by Tom Clancy and Jackie Collins, don't you think?

Again, why all these high-tech solutions? Is no one at the Pentagon looking into my Vivid Girls special forces proposal? You go to war with the porn stars you've got.

Anyway, here's some secret footage of the Air Force's early testing of the weapon:
( Read more... )

I've been a big old Titanic geek since 5th grade when I read Lord's A Night To Remember. I found this hilarious.

I collect Dragon WW2 figures, but this--

Just damn.

And more advanced coding damn.

Now mine are sitting in the storage locker in the basement, and I haven't been acquiring more because, frankly, there's no room for them, even when I see a sweet half-off deal on Ebay. But I can still look on in wonder and awe.

And I suppose in the storage room they will remain because Chats, due to some defect in the female brain, doesn't want a re-creation of the Army Ranger assault on Pointe-du-Hoc on our living room mantle, no matter how cool I can make the assault ladders and grapple lines look. Not even at Christmas.

Kinda surprised this isn't all over my flist. Maybe I missed it.

Anyway, here's the YouTube link

I bring you Stuff on my cat.com

*Goes back to paging through and giggling like a nine year old girl at a sleep-over*

Office Space preview, recut to make it look like a psycho thriller.

Obligatory Red Swingline Stapler link.

Would have been fun to do this to pollsters...

The famous Mabe telemarketing prank.

Chat's found this really rich Tab commercial from the 70s. Okay, the women aren't wearing frilly dresses and big floppy hats but it's the next best thing. And...

Mindsticker?

The thing is, I kinda like Tab. I still buy it now and again when a 12 pack is on sale at the grocery store. It's got this "so awful it's kinda good" flavor to it. Tastes really swell with rum for some reason, too -- Tab is my preferred beverage when whipping up a Skinny Pirate.

This is the first weekend in I-can't-remember-how-long where we haven't had to be somewhere. Ahhhhh, indolence.

Japanese men doing timed tongue twisters. Screw up, and you take one in the nads.

I'm saving this link for the next time someone tells me that the tea ceremony is the epitome of Japanese culture.

I ended up with Mata Hari after taking this quiz.

I was in Naperville yesterday on my rounds of the western burbs and they had one of those painted statue festivals going. Instead of boring old cows or pigs or what have you, it was baby dragons popping out of their eggs.

Just. So. Darn. Cute.

Very much wish I had my camera with me instead of extra sharpies. You can see them at the United Way Mystical Dragons site.

Funny link: Robot Chicken does Star Wars

In this TV clip the BBC thought they were interviewing Guy Kewney, an expert on Internet music downloads, about the Apple Corp. Ltd/Apple Computer lawsuit. Well, thanks to confusion in the green room or whatever, they accidently grabbed a man with the same first name who was there for a job interview, hurried him up to the studio, stuck a mike on his lapel, and interviewed him.

He does a fantastic job as a talking head, if you ask me. There's one shocked moment when he realizes what has happened, then he takes the ball and he friggin' runs with it. Cool Hand Luke has nothing on this guy.

Lileks pretty much summed up how I felt about Kong, only better.

I haven't bought it yet. Maybe if it gets discounted deeply enough at some future point. The original Chats bought me is just sooooo much better.

I found this amusing: Grizzly Bear Man, a parody of Grizzly Man, the story of a oddball named Timothy Treadwell who managed to mix with grizzlies for a number of summers before being killed and eaten along with his girlfriend (the Discover documentary went out of its way to say that she was an "experienced woodsman." Yep. Except that experienced woodsmen stay the hell away from grizzlies).

Anyway, the best part about the parody is the guy doing the Schwartzenegger imitation as Herzog, who made the doco. Oh, and everyone dancing to Age of Aquarius at the end.

"He left behind hours of footage from which I, Werner Herzog, created this cinematic masterpiece which bought me a chalet in the Baltics. When you engrave the Oscar, it's H-E-R-Z-O-G. It's about time, seriously. I drug a boat over a mountain for chrissake. Give me some props."